JUNE 23 2015 I REALLY NEED A DO OVER DAY ~ THIS ONE SUCK$ ¢0¢|<

WHAT THE FUCK!?!

1) Smart water doesn’t work

2) I took a personality test and ummm,,, well it seems that none of them really like me much

4) Called “AA” by mistake, man, they can’t fucking change a tire for shit!

3) FUCK! I can’t count!

5) I don’t like cocaine, but I do
like it’s smell

R) Hmmm, wonder what moths did before the lightbulb was invented

7) SOULMATE /noun/: Soulmate
Satan puts soulmate in his coffee

8) I just saw a man eating ice cream & driving,,, FUCKING sundae drivers!!

9) Fact: Sex is hereditary, if your parents didn’t have it, you won’t have it either

10) How many mimes died because nobody believed they were actually choking?

11) 2:30AM, phone rings: “You sleeping?” *(me): “No ~ I’m FUCKING skydiving!”